Interests:Stage Crew, Video Games, and certain sports. Expertise:Stage Crew, most Video Games, Soccor, Karate, apparently Trombone, spriting Occupation:Soccor Ref, Full Time Older Br Industry:Nonprofit
CHARACTER CHART Date this chart was completed: 9/6/09 Character's Full Name: Jin McWatt Reason or meaning of name: Jin's name comes from "John Ian Ivan," Ian and his two alteregoes. McWatt is a shorter version of MacWatt, which eventually became Watson. McWatt sounds better with Jin, in my opinion. Nickname: The Dark Knight -Reason: He's one (or was one) of King Day's top knights, who was well known for his dark powers.
PHYSICAL APPEARANCE: Age: 25 How old does s/he appear? That age, I guess Eye Color: Green Glasses or contacts: Neither. Weight: 170? Height: 6' ish? Type of body/build: Muscular, but not to a sickening extent. Skin tone: Pretty white Skin type: Not tan Shape of face: Face-shaped? Distinguishing Marks: A swirling black tattoo, concealed under the jeweled gauntlet on his right hand. Predominant feature: His badassery Looks like: he could kick your ass. Is s/he healthy? Extremely. -If not, why not:
FAVORITES: Character's favorite color: Green Music: Gregorian chant Food: Bread Literature: Doesn't have any Expressions: Same as above Expletives: Damnation, maybe.
HABITS: Smokes: No -What? -When and how much? Drinks: Sometimes Hobbies: Training... that's about it.
BACKGROUND: Hometown: ... shit, I forget the name of the Capital city. It started with an M, but I am too tired to remember atm. Type of childhood: Interesting/tragic/privileged. His father was one of King Lumiere's (the father of Day Solas, the future King Day) best men, so he lived within the castle. When his father died in combat, King Lumiere made sure Jin ended up in the care of Vid Strom, Lumiere's best knight and Jin's teacher. First memory: Seeing his father's armor in a closet when he was a young child. Most important childhood event that still affects him/her: The death of his father. -Why? His mom died in childbirth, so his father was his only family left. Education: Educated to be a proper knight by Vid Strom. Religion: Agnostic. Finances: Very wealthy, due to his high status... though he loses both early in the story.
FAMILY: Mother: Madilim McWatt Relationship with her: She died in childbirth. Father: Dimmur McWatt Relationship with him: Looked up to him, A LOT. Siblings: None -How many? Birth order: Relationship with each: Children of siblings:
ATTITUDE Most at ease when: ... does Jin ever relax? o_0 Ill at ease when: This is basically him all the time. Priorities: Kill Day and stop his plans for domination, find out what caused him to fall down this evil path, and clear his name. Philosophy: Chivalry. How s/he feels about self: He's sort of at a loss for feelings, what with the being betrayed by his best friend thing. Past failure s/he would be embarrassed to have people know about: I dunno... Getting his ass handed to him in sparring by Vid a lot when he was younger? -Why? Because it's Jin and he doesn't like getting his ass kicked. If granted one wish, what would it be? That Day didn't go evil. -Why? Day was Jin's best friend.
PERSONALITY: Greatest source of strength in character's personality (whether s/he sees it as such or not): His sense of justice. Greatest source of weakness in character's personality (whether s/he sees it as such or not): His depression. Character's soft spot: He actually has a weakness for women who can dance. -Is this soft spot obvious to others? Not. At. All. He'd probably lose his rep as being a badass if anyone knew. Biggest vulnerability: His past. Or light energy, seeing as his attacks are mainly darkness based.
TRAITS: Optimist or pessimist: Pessimist. -Why? He lost both his parents, was framed for mass murder, and all his old friends have turned on him. You'd be rather pessimistic too. Introvert or extrovert: Introvert -Why? He was never much of a social butterfly. Drives and motivations: To clear his name, stop King Day. Talents: Swordsmanship, dark energy control. Extremely unskilled at: Being super social. Good characteristics: Strong, intimidating, gold-hearted, overall badass-ish. Character flaws: Depressed Mannerisms: Reserved, respectable. Peculiarities: He has an extreme resistance to heat. Biggest regret: He couldn't save his father/he was the reason his mother died. Minor regrets: Not sure. Biggest accomplishment: Finding and becoming the master of Shroud, a powerful greatsword that contains the power of darkness. Minor accomplishments: Not dying? Character's darkest secret: His dark powers are the reason that he's so emotionless/downcast at times. Does anyone else know? No, except for perhaps Day. -If yes, how did they find out? He may figure it out, since his elemental energy, Light, is the polar opposite of Jin's.
SELF-PERCEPTION: One word CHARACTER would use to describe self: Determined. One paragraph description of how CHARACTER would describe self: He tries to not ramble, so yeah... good luck getting that out of him. What does CHARACTER consider best physical characteristic? His eyes. What does CHARACTER consider worst physical characteristic? The tattoos on his hand, where the dark energy entered his body. Are these realistic assessments? If not, why not? Sure. His eyes are cool, and that tattoo is creepy as hell. How CHARACTER thinks others perceive him/her: He thinks most people are afraid of him and view him as an evil person. He's right, for the most part. What four things would CHARACTER most like to change about self? (#1 most important, #2 second most important, etc.) -1. Not as depressed. -2. Stronger. -3. Wiser. -4. A better knight overall. -Why? Self-explanatory. If change #1 was made, would character be as happy as s/he thinks? Probably.
INTERRELATION WITH OTHERS: How does character relate to others? Not very well. Through fighting prowess, I guess. How is s/he perceived by... Strangers? Scary. ... Friends? Loyal. ... Wife/Husband/Lover? N/A, though the girl he comes to love near the end finds him quite attractive. ... Hero/Heroine? N/A How does character view hero/heroine? N/A First impression: N/A -Why? N/A What happens to change this perception? N/A What do family/friends like most about character? He's loyal and sticks to his ideals. That, and he's a pretty nice guy. What do family/friends like least about character? He isn't the most social of people, and he tends to be too hard on himself.
GOALS: Immediate goals: Survive. Long range goals: Kill King Day. How does character plan to accomplish these goals? By amassing a rebel army. How will other characters be affected? They will either join him, try to stop him, or not give two shits.
PROBLEMS/CRISIS: How character reacts in a crisis: Calm and collectedly. How character faces problems: In the best way he can... whether that be head-on or in a roundabout way. Kinds of problems character usually runs into: People trying to kill him. How character reacts to NEW problems: Adapt. How character reacts to change: See above.
GENERAL: Favorite clothing: His dark armor. -Why? It looks nice on him and protects him. Least favorite clothing: Basically everything else. -Why? He's weird like that. Jewelry: There's a green jewel that keeps his power in check on his right gauntlet, which stays on his hand at all times. Other accessories: A blue scarf when disguising as a simple peasant. Drives: Clearing name, killing Day, etc Where does character live? The Capital City, though he becomes homeless once the story begins. Where does character want to live? The Capital City, after he gets kicked out. Spending habits (frugal, spendthrift, etc): Practical. He only buys what he needs. -Why? Because he isn't a wasteful fuck. What does s/he do too much of? Think sad thoughts. Too little of? Think happy thoughts. Most prized possession: Shroud -Why? It was his father's old greatsword, which was lost when he was slain in battle. Jin reclaimed it, and gained it's power.
UNCATAGORIZED: Person character secretly admires: Makashine Selymet, though he doesn't meet her until much later on. -Why? She's dark, beautiful, and a good dancer. She also wants to kill King Day, but for different reasons. Person character was most influenced by: His father. -Why? He became a knight because of him. Most important person in character's life before story starts: King Day and Vid Strom. -Why? They are his best friends. How does character spend the week before the story starts? Finding out King Day's plans of global conquest, trying to gather support from the Flame Nomad tribe, finding out that Day killed the entire tribe after Jin left them, being blamed for their annihilation, and being exiled from the kingdom.
I think that out of the billions of characters I have, Jin is my favorite. :D
Because I need something to post here, I figured I'd outline some characters from my various stories.
CHARACTER CHART Date this chart was completed: August 25th, 2009 Character's Full Name: Ian Thomas Watson Reason or meaning of name: It's my name IRL Nickname: The Author -Reason: He's kind of the reason that all the different universes exist that make up the overall story.
PHYSICAL APPEARANCE: Age: 18 (at current point), 13 (beginning of story) How old does s/he appear? Older, due to facial hair Eye Color: Hazel Glasses or contacts: Glasses Weight: 165 Height: 5;9"-5'10" Type of body/build: Bigger Skin tone: Average Caucasian Skin type: WHITE Shape of face: Face-shaped. Distinguishing Marks: None Predominant feature: Beard Looks like: A fuzzy animal Is s/he healthy? Sure? -If not, why not:
FAVORITES: Character's favorite color: Blue Music: Weird shit Food: Cheese steaks Literature: Fantasy Expressions: :D Expletives: EVERYTHING
HABITS: Smokes: Nope -What? -When and how much? Drinks: Nope Hobbies: Writing, playing videogames, being your average angsty/boring teenager.
BACKGROUND: Hometown: Horsham Type of childhood: Fun First memory: His first bath, up until he hit his head on the side of the tub. Most important childhood event that still affects him/her: idk -Why? *shurg* Education: High School, starting college soon. Religion: Presbyterian Finances: Poor. He's going into college, remember?
FAMILY: Mother: Deborah Watson Relationship with her: Pretty good Father: Bill Watson Relationship with him: Rocky at times, but it's okay. Siblings: Yes -How many? 5 Birth order: Oldest Relationship with each: He likes them all, but also thinks they're insane. Children of siblings: None
ATTITUDE Most at ease when: With friends Ill at ease when: Thinking too deeply Priorities: Live life? Philosophy: Let it be. How s/he feels about self: Alright, I guess Past failure s/he would be embarrassed to have people know about: Hell if I'm telling you. -Why? Cause this character is the self-insert narrator type character. If granted one wish, what would it be? I dunno. -Why?
PERSONALITY: Greatest source of strength in character's personality (whether s/he sees it as such or not): Inner optimism. Yes. Greatest source of weakness in character's personality (whether s/he sees it as such or not): Gets too caught up on people. Yes. Character's soft spot: Friends -Is this soft spot obvious to others? Yes. Biggest vulnerability: His heart.
TRAITS: Optimist or pessimist: Both. -Why? He's pretty optimistic about some things, yet pessimistic about others. Introvert or extrovert: Extrovert -Why? Duh. Drives and motivations: Friends and family Talents: Writing, thinking, karate Extremely unskilled at: Riding a bike? Good characteristics: Friendly, loving, fuzzy Character flaws: Over-emotional Mannerisms: Weird Peculiarities: See above. Biggest regret: Probably something girl related Minor regrets: See above. Biggest accomplishment: Getting his black belt. Minor accomplishments: Waking up in the morning. Character's darkest secret: His imagination holds the multiple stories and universes that the stories focus on. Does anyone else know? No. He doesn't even know. XD -If yes, how did they find out?
SELF-PERCEPTION: One word CHARACTER would use to describe self: Fuzzy One paragraph description of how CHARACTER would describe self: Too lazy to write a paragraph. XD What does CHARACTER consider best physical characteristic? His beard What does CHARACTER consider worst physical characteristic? His stomach? Are these realistic assessments? If not, why not? Sure? I dunno! How CHARACTER thinks others perceive him/her: He's kind of paranoid, so this changes a lot What four things would CHARACTER most like to change about self? (#1 most important, #2 second most important, etc.) -1. Stop being lame -2. ? -3. ? -4. ? -Why? If change #1 was made, would character be as happy as s/he thinks? Maybe
INTERRELATION WITH OTHERS: How does character relate to others? Either awesomely or not at all. How is s/he perceived by... Strangers? Scary ... Friends? Interesting ... Wife/Husband/Lover? Cool, I guess ... Hero/Heroine? The multiple heroes don't know he exists, so no opinion. How does character view hero/heroine? He bases a lot of them off of himself, or him during different points of his life, so he usually has a high opinion of them. First impression: Of the heroes? Different for each one. -Why? What happens to change this perception? Different things. What do family/friends like most about character? He's a good guy What do family/friends like least about character? He's insane.
GOALS: Immediate goals: Survive college Long range goals: Get married How does character plan to accomplish these goals? Live How will other characters be affected? Lots of ways, I guess?
PROBLEMS/CRISIS: How character reacts in a crisis: Depends on the crisis. How character faces problems: Either head on or he ignores it. Kinds of problems character usually runs into: Girl related. How character reacts to NEW problems: See answer two above. How character reacts to change: Uh...
GENERAL: Favorite clothing: Shirts with words -Why? They're fun to wear. Least favorite clothing: Most hats -Why? Hat hair. Jewelry: None Other accessories: Glasses Drives: Nope. Where does character live? Pennsylvania Where does character want to live? Pennsylvania Spending habits (frugal, spendthrift, etc): Frugal-ish -Why? He's poor What does s/he do too much of? Think Too little of? Write Most prized possession: His katanas, his obi -Why? They're awesome and a good inspiration for writing, he went through hell to get it.
UNCATAGORIZED: Person character secretly admires: Not sure. -Why? Person character was most influenced by: His dad -Why? He's a lot like him. Most important person in character's life before story starts: His friends -Why? He <3's them. How does character spend the week before the story starts? Seeing as the stories mostly take place in different times/places, it is unknown what exactly Ian does before they start. He normally ends up creating them, and doesn't really turn up in them at all, save for a few occasions.
Really, Ian's a pretty boring character. The story isn't about him, so it doesn't exactly focus on him very much, if at all. He only really becomes important during any crossovers, like Battle Royale.
I think I'll try to do one of these every time I get bored, so there's actually some content on here.
Well, I've been up to Hell Week, just like the majority of my friends who still use this site have been. That's what, punk.
*pops a cap in Xanga's ass*
Well, whenever I post here, it normally means I have something long winded, angsty, or something I don't want everyone on Facebook to see.
This is a slight combination of all three, so bare (or would it be BEAR, seeing as it's me?) with me here.
So, as you all know, or knew, or thought at one point, or were lead to believe (or something), I had a thing for Steph again.
Before you begin to point out how stupid I was for this, or "Blehh, Steph," or the whole "BUT HER AND ADARIAN AND OH GOD WHY?!", I'd like to defend myself by saying that since she moved, she had really changed a whole lot from the lusty mass of slutness that she had become right before she moved away. She broke up with Adarian and Taylor (plus points), apologized for what she did (plus points), and even acted like she was interested in me again (plus pooooiiiints!).
Basically: It seemed like a good idea at the time.
So yeah. Things were looking good for a while. However, if you know me, and you all do (unless you wandered upon this thing in an act of creeping around on the internet, in which case, GTFO), you should know that nothing ever goes acording to plan, and that a monkey wrench of despair was about to lodge itself in my clockwork mechanism of hope.
Late last year, her aunt got sick. Really, really sick. She couldn't work anymore, which cut off one source of funds to the house. To add onto that, their either really crappy/lack of health insurance didn't cover enough/any of the expenses of buying the medication for her, and that stuff is expensive as fuck. Without it, she has issues even walking. One perscription or bottle or whatever lasts her... I think they said 14 days? Not very long.
To add onto this, they had/have to finish paying their mortgage on their house by a set, upcoming date. If her aunt was fine, this wouldn't be a problem. However, due to the mass suckage of money on the medication, this soon became a very daunting, very big, very shitty problem.
They have/had until April 9th. When that date arrived with their bills unpaid, they would lose their home.
From there, they had a few options. Steph's aunt assured me she had places for all the children, should they lose their home. Relatives and stuff. In Steph's case, it was her actual parents. If you know Steph's parents and her relations with them, you'd know how bad this is. Her parents' failure at raising her is what she attributes to her cutting and deep depression, and she told me more than once that she believes that if she hadn't left that house, she might have ended up in a mental institution or worse. So, going back there is out of the question.
Steph kept saying how she really wanted to stay with her aunt and go with her to a homeless shelter, if worst came to worst. So that's option two.
And then there's option three. Her aunt had talked about the possibility of one of their other relatives having space at their home in Colorado. Realistically, if that happens, I probably wouldn't see her again for a long, long time. Sure, we could still talk through email and phone and stuff (hopefully), but I'd miss being with her. A lot.
Fast forward to February. I ask Steph to Winter Ball. She says yes. Woot. I figure this is finally my chance to get back together with her. And, for a while, it looked as if I was right.
The first slow dance of the night, over time, she grew closer and closer to me until she was cuddled right up next to me. I hadn't held her, or, really, anyone (Allie wasn't too interested in cuddling with me when we were together, sort of, not really, Idunno anymore) like that in forever, and it just made me feel... loved.
However, after that, things went downhill.
Steph's attention seemed to be grabbed, almost instantly, by Shannon Harvey (one of the other bi girls that Steph always seems to have some sort of flame for, though she had said something to me earlier about how she was over it >.>), and then later by my freind Matt Doghramji. It felt like my heart was being fucking torn in two when I saw her dancing in the "hump and jump" fashion with them, and it just... killed me on the inside. Like, I'm only the most interesting thing to her in her world... so long as no one else more interesting is around. You know what I mean.
So, I was pretty bummed after that. And I was even more hurt. I felt betrayed. That was my one special night with her, and it was basically ruined.
However, I played it off like I was just extremely tired and worn out, not super depressed and bummed. And, other than that whole incident, I really did have fun at Winter Ball with everyone.
I talked to Evan about it the next day, and he suggested that Steph may have been a bit overwhelmed by seeing so many people that she hadn't seen in over a year, and just kind of lost control. He said that he firmly believed that she liked me, and that I shouldn't worry about it too much.
So I tried not to.
And it came to get me.
On the Monday after Winter Ball, Taylor came up to me, and she looked pretty upset. Seeing as I only normally get a wave out of her, I asked her what was up. She asked if I went to Winter Ball with Steph, and I said I did. She then got really upset and flipped out, ranting about how Steph should have told her, and how if they were going out, she should actually talk to her and tell her about what's going on.
This is around my birthday, now, so I figure that counts as my birthday crisis I have every year. Steph, who had assured me she wasn't going out with anyone, was actually still going out with Taylor. I didn't know what to think, and I didn't know what I could say to her that wouldn't risk me getting pissed and angry and flipping out and whatnot.
So I did what I do best.
I said nothing.
No calling. No emailing. No contact.
Nothing.
It started out at first as just being busy, what with Hatchat, Crew, feeling a bit sick, Jazz band, and shattering my thumb. But soon, it just became me legitimately avoiding calling her or emailing her.
After a month of this, I made up my mind.
I was done with her. Not as a friend, mind you, but done chasing her. No matter how hard I try, nor how hard I wish, or strive, or dream, she would forever be unattainable. We will never be together. She will always be interested in something or someone else far more than she is in me, and the sooner I come to accept that, the sooner I can move on with my life.
Now, the hard part... telling this to her.
I got an email from her, when she said that she was sorry for missing my birthday, and how she was sorry for a lot of things. She said she understood if I didn't want to talk to her, but if I did, I should email her back, as she missed me.
And so, in the little time I had in the morning, I sent her a reply:
Oh God Steph, I knew this would happen if I didn't get my act together. >.<
I actually planned to call you on my birthday, but... yeah, it was my birthday and all. My parents actually decided to make a big deal about it this year, so I was kind of wiped out with stuff to do.
From there, things just got busy. Jazz band competitions, major Hatchat stuff, super psychology projects, impaling a thumb, getting sick..... thinking.
But for all the things that happened, I think the one main reason I didn't call you was fear. Or maybe nervousness. But I guess that's some kind of fear.
Now, I'm guessing Taylor told you about how she talked to me at school weeks back, judging from how worried this email sounded. And it was probably that one interaction between the two of us that had me thinking so hard.
I... I'm still not sure what's really going on with that. It seems that every time I think things are going great, or I have a shot at repairing things, they just kind of turn around and bite me in the ass.
But, so far as I can tell, I guess I was wrong about you no longer being with Taylor. I thought you had said that that had ended a while back, and that belief was only concreted more by that conversation we had where you talked about taking a break from relationships for a while.
I'm not angry or anything about that. But it sure did make me confused and question myself.
So, as I said, me. Thinking. There's been a lot of it.
And through this thinking and observations, I've come to a few conclusions.
And through those conclusions, I've come to a decision.
... and this could be the point where you become pissed at me and decide you don't want to email me back. We shall see.
I can't take you to prom, Steph. Not only can I not monetarily afford to buy my own ticket, your ticket, and a limo, I would feel majorly wrong taking you if you're together with Taylor. If you do go to my Senior prom, you deserve to have the night of your life with it... something I won't be able to provide in this current state.
Plus, I know what it's like to see someone you like be taken to a dance by someone who is/who you thought was your friend. It isn't fun, and it hurts like hell. I'm not going to do that to Taylor... even if she did something equally as hurtful to me a year ago.
Through all the thinking and decisions and whatnot, the most important thing I realized is this:
All of this isn't worth losing your friendship, or becoming angry and distant like we were a year plus ago.
You're a good friend Steph. I was so afraid I had lost you for good last year. And when we started talking again, I was so happy.
I don't want to risk losing you like that again. It isn't worth it. Not for me.
I don't really know what else to say. Hopefully I'll hear back from you again soon. And if you do end up going to prom with Adarian, I guess I'll see you then. Hopefully sooner, if either of us can free up our schedules.
Take care,
-Ian
I never got a responce back.
However, something interesting did end up happening on her end.
Not even two days after I sent that email, Shannon and various others asked me if I knew why Steph had suddenly broke up with Taylor. I responded truthfully: I had no idea, and I didn't want to get involved. I'd been hurt way too many times, and I had decided it wasn't worth the friendship between Steph and I.
So, since then, I've been dreading picking up the phone. I want to call and talk to her so badly, but I'm afraid. Afraid of what I may say. Afraid of what she may say. Afraid of what might happen.
I was planning on calling her after I was done writing this, but fuck, it's too late for that now.
And if I don't balls up soon, it may be too late. Period.
No matter what happens... I have to call her tomorrow. I have to talk to her one last time. I have to speak to her before she moves. I have to finally seal my closure on this entire Steph Faust saga.
I have to say goodbye.
On a much happier note, I actually do have a date to prom who isn't psychopathic and won't play with my feelings. Her name is Janice Marin. She's a sweet girl, and I really like her a lot. I dunno if my feelings of baawwness are returned, but it'll be at least nice to spend time with her at prom.
And so, that's it, Xanga. That's my story, spewed from my mind, condenced a thousandfold, and typed onto the internet for all to read. Hopefully this isn't tl;dr for people to just skip over.
